Aftermath of an Affair
Whether you had an affair, or your partner had an affair it has drastically changed your relationship. An affair is such a devastating betrayal that it is considered a traumatic event. The partner who was betrayed often experiences some degree of PTSD. If your partner had an affair, you might have images of the affair invade your thoughts frequently, you might be having nightmares, feel violated, unsafe, be wondering “what is wrong with me” and you may fear having sex again or imagine your somewhere else when you do. Chances are you feel isolated as many of your friends and family members try to convince you to leave or tell you to forgive and move on. Contrary to what others might tell you the affair does not need to be the end of your relationship, it is also no something you can just brush off, it needs to be worked through. If you are feeling like your partner isn’t hearing or understanding your pain, are still having intrusive thoughts, or lashing out at your partner, we can help you start healing so you can trust and feel safe in your relationship again.
If you are the one who had the affair there are a variety of reasons why it happened, you felt lonely, unwanted, undesired, were hurt, and withdrew because you didn’t want to be hurt anymore. Explaining these reasons right now will not help as it will sound to your spouse like you are blaming them for YOUR affair. Since it happened you probably feel huge amounts of guilt and shame. If your partner knows you might feel attacked like they are just piling on the shame and guilt you already feel, and you are wondering when you can get back to normal. The best thing you can do is listen to how your spouse feels, take responsibility, and apologize repeatedly. However, if you are continuously being criticized or accused of things that is not ok. We can help you work through the healing process, without being attacked or criticized, and help get your relationship back on track.
This is one of the toughest things your relationship will ever endure, but we can help you heal and start rebuilding your relationship. We can significantly increase your chances of long-term success by taking you through a three-phase process to heal the hurt, repair the damage and rebuild the trust that has been broken, as result of the affair. Research has shown affairs do not usually happen when all is well within the relationship and is often a symptom of other problems. Not only do we help you repair the damage done, but we also help you repair the problems leading up to the affair and prevent future affairs from happening. Make an appointment today to start your healing journey and create the kind of relationship that works for you and your family.